by Unknown on Saturday, November 24, 2007

#74: Kristy and the Copycat

Can you even deal with this cover? I sure can't.

And, to a: the q: in the tagline: only if crimes of fashion don't count.

For a Kristy-narrated book, this is surprisingly loaded with outfit descriptions.

"Claudia settled back on one of the benches with Alicia on her lap and began rooting around in her backpack. I was guessing that she had some junk food stashed inside (Claudia is a junk food gourmet) but I was wrong. [Something tells me Kristy is gonna have some trouble sleeping tonight.] She pulled out a pair of sunglasses: the frames were plain round wire rims, but the green plastic lenses were square, stuck into the frames by their four corners. I had to smile. Claudia definitely has style, and it's definitely, uniquely hers."

Of course Claudia is coming to Krushers practice, now that it's plot-convenient. I see right through you, ghostwriters. A+ on the sunglasses, though.

Okay guys, New York Style coming up!

"Stacey had pulled back her permed [gotta mention that every book] blonde hair back with a leopard-print scarf tied under one ear. [?] She was wearing one of her favorite pairs of earrings, gold leaf-shaped ones. She was also wearing a black wrap long-sleeve top, a short low-slung skirt with a big belt, black tights, and leopard print flats. She looked extremely cool. Which of course she is."

Wow. If the ghostwriters were trying to describe a ballet wrap cardigan, I'm actually kind of on board with that. The rest of it I could take or leave.

"What can I say about Claudia? She's as cool as Stacey. But if Stacey's style is New York [it is?!], Claudia's is - planetary. Out of this world. Planet Claudia."

. . . .

"Today she was into big [that's what she said. what? I miss The Office.]: a big yellow shirt with red x-shaped buttons, enormously baggy white pants, and big red Doc Martens double-laced with black and yellow shoelaces. Her long straight black hair was pulled upon top of her head with more black and yellow shoelaces braided together. Her earrings said 'stop' and 'go' - 'stop' in her left ear and 'go' in her right."

I'd forgotten about those earrings! Excellent work, Claud. Good show, good show.

"On the theory that the clothes make the coach (or at least help), Claudia and Stacey had conferred the night before and had dressed up for the occasion. Claudia was wearing a red satin baseball cap, purple sweatpants that were cut off just below the knees, purple high-tops with neon pink laces, red-and-white-striped socks, and a red and pink tie-dyed crop top shirt. Stacey was in black bicycle shorts with neon yellow racing stripes down the sides, a pair of Nikes with matching neon yellow swooshes on the side, (but ordinary white laces [Claudia: 1 Stacey: 0]), an enormous white v-neck t-shirt, a black jog bra, and a Brooklyn Dodgers baseball cap, turned around backwards. They were both using old gloves of mine. Stacey was wearing my whistle. Claudia had this funky clay whistle shaped like a bird on a leather thong around her neck that she'd made in art class. It didn't really blast like Stacey's, but the Krushers all liked it anyway."

I'm glad for them.


I kind of covet Stacy's first outfit. Everything else is vomitous, of course. I keep tripping over "a red and pink tie-dyed crop top shirt." That's way too many modifiers.

by shegotzen on 6:03 PM. #

Am I the only one who doesn't picture 13-year-old girls wearing this kind of stuff? In my head, I see 15 or 16-year-old...

And btw, red DOESN'T fit with neon pink and purple! That's simply awful :P

by Émilie on 9:10 AM. #

I never liked Kristy too much anyhoo.. that cover confirms it.

by MizMouthy on 10:06 AM. #

My brain simply won't allow me to fully picture Claud's last outfit. Perhaps some sort of defense mechanism is kicking in.

by Alicia on 6:12 PM. #

"Her earrings said 'stop' and 'go' - 'stop' in her left ear and 'go' in her right."

I have those earrings. They're actually awesome. Claudia must have influenced me. For the better? Perhaps not.

by Louise on 6:31 PM. #

I think I *hearts* you. This blog brings me countless joy!

by Clara Cupcakes on 4:33 AM. #

My nan used to have this random clay whistle at her house. Every time we went there I would secretly eye it off and wish it were shaped like a bird, it was on a leather thong, and just... pretty much that I was Claudia.

by stace on 4:44 PM. #

So Kristy just happens to know what bra Stacey is wearing. Has she been peeking down the neck of Stacey's huge teeshirt when Stacey bends over?

Or is Stacey meant to be wearing her bra OVER her teeshirt? Coz that's just putting poor Kristy through hell.

by Jennie on 6:54 PM. #

I was thinking the straps peeked out because it was SO big, but you're right; how we she know it was a jog bra? For that matter, doesn't she mean sports bra?

I sort of hope she was wearing it over her t-shirt, but maybe that's as little too scandalous for the Krashers. If so, I imagine it looked like this:

by Mary on 6:14 PM. #

P.S. That little Karen is a bitch.

by Mary on 6:15 PM. #

brooklyn dodgers hat? They moved to LA in 1958!! I doubt shes wearing a hat thats over 30 years old at the time the story was written.

by Chase's mommy! on 12:38 PM. #

No way a black bra under a white tee isn't going to be blatantly visible. The tee being enormous, you could easily make out that it was a "jogging bra." I guess the bra-peeking-out look was pretty big in the 90s. But no one's saying it's an appropriate look for a 13-year-old child.

by Libellule on 3:34 AM. #

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