by Unknown on Friday, June 04, 2010

Readers' Request: Shannon's Story

I don't know about you guys, but I certainly don't remember requesting a story about Shannon. Yes, fine, I did find her mildly intriguing -- she went to private school and had a "ski jump nose" (she supposedly wanted a nosejob to straighten it out) and fastidious handwriting. She was also the BSC member most likely to end up in rehab for amphetamine addiction, based on her insane, perfectionistic lust for academics and extracurriculars. Which would have made a much more interesting story.
Instead we get a story about Shannon's overbearing mother and absentee lawyer father and unhappy rich people family dynamics. Shannon is pissed at her mom for chaperoning the class trip to Paris (must be nice to be a Stoneybrook Day School student, huh?), so she decides to intentionally fail her French exam (she is quick to inform us that she could have aced it). This means she can't go on the trip and eventually she -- yawn -- learns a valuable lesson about how boring it is to be a stay at home mom.

Judging by this cover, one of her younger sisters is colorblind (green, red, and white Cosby sweater paired with a purple jean skirt? Girrrl, even Claudia wouldn't go there) and struggling with an eating disorder*. Rich people: they're just like you and me! Except when they cry, their housekeepers wipe away the tears. With hundred dollar bills.

Shannon also occasionally attends BSC meetings. You know, to remind herself how the little people live.

"Given Stacey's style, it's not surprising that Claudia is her best friend. As I said earlier, Claudia is an artist, with her own unique vision of the world (a vision that does not include liking school or being an honor role** student!) and of the clothes she wears. For example, today Stacey looked ultra-city in black: black leggings, a black sweater, a big black belt with an oversized buckle, black Doc Martens, and her hair pulled back with a black and gold scarf that picked up the gold of the gold chain earrings she was wearing.

Claudia was beyond the city, maybe into outer space and looking outrageous, artistically terrific: an enormous pair of pants held up with a man's belt and a pair of neon purple suspenders, an enormous purple t-shirt over a tie-dyed long-underwear top, her long black hair pulled into a braid clipped at intervals with little-kid barrettes, and these dangly peace sign earrings."

So, wait. Does the enormous purple t-shirt just kinda blouse out around the suspenders? How does THAT work? I have so many questions about so many of Claudia's ensembles, which is a sure sign that it's time to up my dosage.

* Her legs are seriously freakin' me out here. At first I thought my scanner had somehow distorted the image, but that's really what the cover looks like. Also, I'd like to point out that Shannon only has one foot. Troubling.
** I believe they were looking for 'honor roll' here. But I could be wrong, I didn't attend Stoneybrook Day School.

19 comments

Shannon looks exactly like Dawn. Amazing.

What are they doing to that poor dog?

by Shannon SVH on 2:25 PM. #

(a vision that does not include liking school or being an honor role student!)

Maybe because she's DYSLEXIC? Damn Shannon...

by Sara on 2:38 PM. #

It's possible Shannon does have two feet: one human foot and one Bernese Mountain Dog foot.

by BeeKay on 3:00 PM. #

Wow, I basically completely forgot about Shannon.

by Lis on 3:45 PM. #

Poor Astrid.

I always felt bad that Shannon had to share her name with a dog and in fact it felt like Shannon the dog got more mentions. And she doesn't even have a foot.

And now that I've seen the word Shannon so many times, I can't get it out of my head. Seeing Shannon SVH kind of made me freak out a little. Shannon Shannon Shannon!

by Sadako on 4:55 PM. #

LOL whenever they describe Claud's shirts that are under her t-shirts, I always wonder *how on earth can you see the other t-shirt to describe it*? In this case I'm guessing the neck of the tie-dye tank is higher than the purple t-shirt? Why on earth do I think so hard about these things?

I agree btw that Shannon and Dawn seem to be long lost twins according to the illustrators. Personally I enjoyed their rendition of Shannon's ritzy digs in the background here though :)

by goldenmeans on 7:54 PM. #

I know how you feel Sadako. I'm getting all weirded out, thinking everyone is talking to/about me.

by Shannon SVH on 12:00 AM. #

I never requested a Shannon story either, but this blog post makes it all worth it!!

by Breanne at Bella Vita on 12:28 AM. #

Claudia's outfit does sound somewhat alien...why does she need a belt AND suspenders?! There are so many layers to her outfit...but she sounds like a piece of grape bubblicious!

by Mehreen on 1:22 AM. #

Maybe Claudia also had an eating disorder and that is why she wore such baggy clothes, to conceal her emaciated frame. It would make sense that with all the junk food binges, there may be some purges happening too.

If Shannon only has one foot, why are they always making such a big deal about her ski-jump nose? I'm sure the rich kids of Stoneybrook Day School would not be accepting of uni-footedness (or having one dog foot)!

by uglygirl on 5:18 AM. #

Maybe the suspenders are hanging down? That's the only way both a belt and suspenders and a baggy shirt make sense.

But it's Claudia. You probably shouldn't question.

by Caroline on 12:27 PM. #

After having a high-stress day, I found some time to check up on the blogs I follow and seeing this new post made my day and gave me a few laughs! THANK YOU!!

I too had totally forgotten about Shannon, but I DO remember Claudia's neon purple suspenders (though it's possible they were mentioned in more than one of her outfits.)

by Anne-Marie on 4:38 PM. #

i remember being strangely intrigued by the idea of a "ski jump nose" and spending ridiculous amounts of time trying to draw what i believed such a nose looked like.

by luna on 1:57 AM. #

I find it hard to believe that Shannon and her tennis sweater would find Claudia's outfit "terrific." And just how enormous are these pants Claudia has on? JNCO enormous?

by Sada on 2:04 AM. #

I'm not even skimming the comments to see if this is already mentioned but the suspenders are CLEARLY under the tie dyed top which is under the oversized shirt. Layering! Claud's all about that stuff. Obviously.

by Amber Gail on 11:21 PM. #

Oh, and also, I would love love LOVE to illustrate all her outfits cut out doll style.

by Amber Gail on 11:22 PM. #

LMAO - I never noticed Shannon's missing foot!! Too funny!

As for Claud's outfit, I guess she was going for a Grimace from McD's look?

by The Tea Slinger on 4:25 PM. #

I actually was always intrigued about the forgotten BSC member, and was stoked when this book came out. Of course, the book itself wasn't that memorable.
As for the "ski jump nose" bit, it was described as an asset, not a flaw. If anything, she probably had that shape *after* her nose job; it's the most requested shape to plastic surgeons and is considered classic.

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